A volunteer from Planned Pethood spotted this young pup being sold for a couple of bucks outside a market in Indiana. Given his clear aptitude for accounting and management, she quickly took him (and his tiny abacus) back to Ohio, where he had a short stay in a foster home before being adopted ... er, hired by The Modern Firm. These days, Reuben is a regular K9 to 5’er keeping the sales team happy, entertained, and efficient. He works hard but plays harder!
Returned to Planned Pethood several times before finding his forever home, this unique character took on the role of Director of the Humans when it became clear that they were doing an abominable job of managing themselves. He has one human in particular, Kristin, wrapped around his little paw. He spends his day ensuring she leaves her desk as often as possible to get in the recommended daily 10,000 steps — by procuring him treats and walking him around the neighborhood.
Originally from Detroit, Michigan, Jupiter found his calling in web design after moving to Ann Arbor with the help of Happy Days Dog & Cat Rescue. As Head of Environmental Compliance for The Modern Firm, he keeps our company green by shredding (and composting) all manner of cardboard, plastic, table scraps, and offensive socks. Jupiter also occasionally moonlights as a Deputy Security Officer at The Modern Firm's downtown Ann Arbor office, where — when not playing tug-o-war with Owner Brendan Chard or being disciplined for insubordination by our Chief of Security — he ensures that any and all visitors are carefully vetted and barked at.
The Salzcats have a keen eye for design and are excellent at walking on keyboards. While assertive, they are also cool under pressure. As the Co-Chief Napping Officers, Susuwatari and CATACA make sure to slow us down and use those hands to do something other than typing, like petting their heads or making the laser pointer flit around the room.
Juno joined The Modern Firm after escaping from a secret government detention center in Greensboro, North Carolina, where she was being held as a political prisoner (her cover story was that she was "abandoned" at an "animal shelter"). With a background in espionage, Juno heads up TMF's Squirrel and UPS Driver Surveillance Unit. When not apprehending suspects, Juno focuses on maintaining an appropriate creative environment for the company's writing staff: brief periods of peaceful silence punctuated with encouraging vocalizations in one of the many languages in which she is fluent, including Labrador, Terrier, and French. Inspired by her coworkers' writings, in her spare time Juno is working on her next project, a motivational volume with the working title: "WHO'S a Good Girl? YOU Are!"
Although he weighs less than 20 pounds, it's best not to get on the bad side of this rescued Cockapoo from the Almost Home Animal Rescue League in Southfield, Michigan. Seriously. He looks like a living Teddy bear. But he is vicious and will defend The Modern Firm's staff and intellectual property to the death. At least he will if they are threatened, sniffed, or looked at in any way for any reason by Jupiter, his nemesis and cubicle mate.
As Chair of The Modern Firm's Board of Directors, Cookie Dough is responsible for setting a course for the company's overall corporate trajectory. Her connections on Wall Street and in Silicon Valley give TMF a strategic edge when it comes to market fluctuations and tech trends. One of the first small-tech leaders to anticipate the need for American Disabilities Act compliance by websites, she is also known in the industry for championing accessibility and non-discrimination. In her off-time, Cookie Dough is a respected triathlete. She also really enjoys hay.